WARNING! THE FOLLOWING BLOG ENTRY CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE AND SOME SEXUAL CONTENT. IT IS INTENDED FOR IMMATURE SPORTS FANS AND POP CULTURE LOVERS WHO ENJOY READING ....
Now lets get to it shall we?....
BRITNEY SPEARS-MISSION POSSIBLE?
Okay my darling followers I have a mssion for you should you choose to accept it and I hope you do. Britney Spears recently made news for 2 big reasons...
1) Hanging out at a club with Paris Hilton and shedding her pants to dance/hangout in fishnet
stockings. (want to see that :)
2) Getting out of a cab and photographed wearing no panties up her skirt revealing her pussy.(definitely that too)
Your mission? Send me photos in jpeg of Britney in both #1 and #2 situations.
When you have both photos contact the prez and we'll arrange where you can send them to me.
I think Britney's HOT though I think she'd be sexier if she stopped smoking.
DAISUKE MATSUZAKA'S KNICKNAME
The big rage is what do we call this fucking Japanese pitcher. We have to come up with a cool knickname. Its like Red Sox Nation are trying to name a fucking new puppy! If I'm Matzakawa I think of a knickname I friggin like and tell my PR guy to tell Red Sox nation the name to call me. ENOUGH OF LETS NAME THE PITCHER!
Seriously - if you're one of those assholes who got all caught up racking your beer soaked brain coming up with a knickname for Matsuzaka or if you spent a cup of coffees worth of time
debating it then obviously you need to wear a hockey helmet FT in life.
RED SOX COURT DICE K IN LA
Yep the Red Sox brass all flew out to hold their first conversation with the Daisuke Matsuzaka (Dice). Shit if you spent $51 million to talk for a month you may as well get your fucking money's worth. John Henry Tom Werner Larry Lucchino Theo Epstein and Terry
Francona all flew out to see Dice and have dinner with him.
Dice apparantly was thrilled to meet the Sox brass and it was the highlight of his visit to USA.
Says a lot for California huh? No confirmation on whether TV mogul Werner gave Dice a
night of hot monkey love with the actress of his choice.
CONGRATULATIONS PAUL MARA!
For being the first Bruin to fight in months. Toronto's Darcy Tucker who took Mara's fists plans a rematch. YAY!
KRAMER GOES NUTS !
Michael Richards of Kramer fame recently got into a vulgar racist tirade towards a couple of black hecklers.
PUNISHMENT: Put Richards in a prison naked in the black section with no KY jelly to use. He should be gang raped by well hung African American prisoners day and night for 2 months while
his tirade is played. Maybe Richards asshole will be stretched out enough to stick his head up there.
HOTTEST BOSTON FEMALE RADIO VOICE - WZLX FM's HEATHER FORD!
I'm a fan of ladies on the radio. I really am. I love listening to ZLX's news girl and Karlson and
MacKenzie's news lady Heather Ford. She's funny, got a great laugh and has a very sexy voice on the airwaves. She's one of the main reasons I listen to ZLX FM in the morning.
YAY TOM CRUISE GOT MARRIED...
I think the midget Tom Cruise is so fucking gay. I really do. Why can't we get all the celebrity
scientologists on John Travolta's plane and shoot it over the damn sky so that it crashes into L.Ron Hubbard's house?
Best Tom Cruise movie: TopGun and he had those ugly funny looking chest muscles.
A lot of guys ask me what do we do when we have our periods?
We fucking work! Yep. We don't take a week off because of menstruation. Basically we take our tampon cut the string and tuck it up our pussies and go on stage. While we're spread eagled or bending over showing you our twats we're looking in the mirror hoping our string isn't hanging out. We'll run backstage and retuck it. A few times I've seen girls get their periods while on
stage - its not pretty.
A BIG FUUUUUCK YOU! TO MICHAEL VICK!
Falcons QB Michael Vick after losing Sunday came off the field to a round of boos. Hey the Falcs
suck! So Vick drops his helmet and gives the fans the double bird! Mike if you were in the Frozen Tundra you should have had ice balls thrown at you!
You blame your receivers for not catching your passes well Mike if you started throwing like Mike and less like Vicky you'd have an argument. You should be grateful fans show up to see you fuck up the offense.
FANS WANT A NEW DOC!
Yes the Celtics fans have taken to ask for a new Dr. in the house after a dismal Celtics start.
Celts GM - former Blue Jays 3B and apparently deaf Danny Ainge said No!
So your stuck watching the fat assed Celtics Scareleaders.
Can someone please for the friggin' life of me explain why the Red Sox want to sign the injury prone JD Drew? This guys no better than Eric Hinske whom we have under contract for shorter money. I would rather sign Trot Nixon for lower money and a 1 year deal.
LOOKING AHEAD TO FA's In 2007
Next years class of baseball FA's look to be more attractive..
SP's: Carlos Zambrano - John Smoltz (he'll retire), Mark Buehrle and Freddy Garcia.
Red Sox should get Zambrano
CLOSERS: Mariano Rivera (yankee for life)-
Joe Nathan-Trevor Hoffman-Jason Isringhausen....
CATCHERSL Ivan Rodriguez-Jorge Posada (yankee for life) Michael Barrett
INFIELDERS Jeff Kent-Carlos Guillen-Marcus Giles - Rangers hold option on Michael Young
OUTFIELDERS- Ichiro-Vernon Wells, Andruw Jones, Jermaine Dye, Bobby Abreu, Tori Hunter, and Adam Dunn
BOTTOM LINE? A lot of MLB teams saving for this FA class. The Red Sox shedding BIG salaries after 2007 will be very very big shoppers in the 2007 offseason.
I think this is the FA Market the Red Sox are waiting for.
WICKED EARLY RED SOX 2007 SIGNING PREDICTIONS...
SP: Garcia (I think the Cubs or Yanks get Zambrano);
CLOSER: Joe Nathan or Trevor Hoffman (the Sox will spend BIG BUCKS for a top closer)
CATCHER: they'll extend Varitek
INFIELDERS: Jeff Kent.
OF: Andruw Jones and Vernon Wells.
MANNY HEADED WEST THIS WEEKEND
All of MLB expecting Red Sox slugger Manny Ramirez to be traded to a west coast team San
Francisco Giants or the LA Dodgers this weekend. Its likely to be a 3 team trade that gets done and Manny will go to the Dodgers with the Dodgers surrendering top pitching prospect Chad Billingsley as one of the players to Boston. I like the idea of shipping Ramirez out and freeing up the money and getting rid of the big drama queen.
The Red Sox will likely get prospects they can combine in a trade to get a stud player or two under contract in a future deal. So with Ramirez gone where does that leave the Red
The Red Sox do not want franchise player and poster boy David Ortiz upset or unprotected. I will guarantee you that Epstein has told Ortiz the teams plans regarding Manny's departure.
The Sox unfortunately are signing RF JD Drew who doesn't wield a Manny like bat. The Sox will sign ss Julio Lugo whose not going to scare many pitchers either.
Again what does Boston do? They have 2 options.
1) Rent a veteran LF slugger for a year knowing that in the 2007 FA class you can buy 2 or 3 big FA sluggers.
2)Trade prospects this off season for a LF stud hitter under contract for 2-3 years.
Either way-Manny's gone this weekend. Just hope he inks an extension with the West Coast
team and doesn't opt for FA after '08 to join the Yanks or Blue Jays.
Yay another Rocky movie followed by another Rambo movie. This is Sly Stallone sending a message to all you 50 somethings that he looks more buff than you.
Of course if you had nothing to do all day but train - could afford top personal trainers, dieticians, plastic surgeons and VIP gyms and got 10s of millions in dollars to undergo this effort I'm sure you guys would.
Its a little short this week but if I get those pics I asked for I'll serve up a bigger/hotter edition of STRIPPER 101.
Til then Grin and Bare It!
XO - Renee