Monday, November 27, 2006

"Hazie" Monday - The Champs and Chumps

Hey Peeps and anyone else checking in. A special "Hey" goes out to Hazel Mae.

Before starting tonight's post, I should mention that our girl Renee checked in earlier with her thoughts from the past week. Scroll down after you read tonight's entry to see what's on Renee's mind - she has a challenge for our readers...check it out and take her up on it. Note: Renee affectionately (I'd like to think) refers to yours truly as "Prez".

For those of you who haven't been here before, Monday night entries take a look back at the week or so that was in the world of sports, highlighting some of the more notable performances. To those who have risen above the rest, we award them with an honourary "Hazie" - the lucky few have the title of "Hazel's Hero" bestowed upon them. While Hazel hasn't officially approved this week's winners, we'd like to think she'd give her trademark smile and thumbs up to our selections.

HAZEL'S HEROES - THE CHAMPS

NHL
The NHL announced its Three Stars for the week - Martin St. Louis of the Tampa Bay Lightning was named First Star, scoring 2 goals and adding 6 assists in three games. Dallas Stars goalie Mike Smith was named the Third Star for posting a 3-0 record, including a shutout, with a 1.73 goals against average and a .917 save percentage.

Anaheim Ducks RW Teemu Selanne was named the league's Second Star. Selanne scored his 500th goal last week - the Finnish Flash is back after a down period in Colorado. Selanne is one of the great Europeans to play the game - a class act and tough as nails.

Toronto Maple Leafs' Captain Mats Sundin returned to the lineup Saturday night to face the Bruins. What made the return notable - and deserving of a Hazie - is that, once again, Sundin returned to the lineup far ahead of the projected timetable (17 days instead of up to 4 weeks). Sundin is the man!


NFL

Dallas Cowboys' QB Tony Romo's performance on Thanksgiving Day deserves another mention. Another 300 yard game with five touchdown passes and no interceptions - the Cowboys have only lost one game with him as the starter...but that one was on Vanderjagt; we'll talk more about him later.

Tennessee Titans' QB Vince Young led his team to a historic comeback victory yesterday against the suddenly pathetic New York Giants. Prior to yesterday, no NFL team had come back from a 21 point deficit with less than 10 minutes to go. On the day, Young was 24/35, for 249 yards and 2 TDs - Young had a key 19 yard run on a 4th and 10, albeit due to a brain cramp on the part of Mathias Kiwanuka who let Young go after having stopped him. Giants' fans, USC Trojans' fans feel your pain. We will grudgingly mention that Adam "Pacman" Jones (a regular on Weird & Whacked Wednesdays) had picked Eli Manning off twice yesterday.

What can you say about the game Patriots' CB Asante Samuel had yesterday? Three interceptions, including one to salt the game away.

As with this morning entry for Hazel's Three Stars, this one won't be popular with Patriots' fans, but Indianapolis Colts' QB Peyton Manning became the youngest QB to reach 3,000 career completions. Enough said about "Archie's boy" - Hazel might grudgingly hand over the hardware, but we'll make up for it by not calling Manning one of Hazel's Heroes.

San Diego Chargers' RB LaDainian Tomlinson makes the cut again. Tomlinson was involved in all three scores in the Chargers' win over the Raiders, rushing for two TDs and throwing for another. The complete package - L.T.


EUROPEAN SOCCER

Ya, we know Hazel doesn't give a rat's ass about European Soccer - though if she did, we'd like to think she's be sporting the maroon and green of Portugal - call this one the "Editor's Choice".

Chelsea defender, and Portuguese international, Ricardo Carvalho scored the game tying goal in a 1-1 draw with Manchester United at Old Trafford yesterday. He doesn't score often, but he is a player in every sense. Honourable mention goes to Chelsea Manager (future manager of the Portuguese National Team???) Jose Mourinho who gave United's crusty old fart Sir Alex Ferguson a $300 bottle of Portuguese wine - call it gamesmanship or a peace offering, whatever...he should have given it to yours truly - or Hazel, who we think would enjoy a good bottle of wine from God's Country.


HAZEL'S ZEROES - THE CHUMPS

NHL

Before highlighting this week's NHL Chumps, we'll start by saying that we know Hazel wouldn't ok the first two selections (conflict of interest), but sometimes we have to call it like we see them.

Boston Bruins' D Paul Mara decided that he had to defend B's big man Zdeno Chara after getting pasted by Toronto's Darcy Tucker. When the play was over, Mara charged Tucker who was involved in a skirmish with B's forward Marc Savard. The tale of the tape reads as follows: Mara is 6'4" and 219 lbs - Tucker is 5'10" and 178 lbs. Memo to Mara, dude I think Chara can take care of himself - and if you are going to claim you were stepping in to save Savard, he deserved to have his assed kicked for his little slash as Tucker was skating away. If I'm Paul Maurice, Wade Belak dresses tomorrow night - and he is told that his role tomorrow is to kick Mara's ass.

Boston Bruins' C Marc Savard. I watched with amusement (and some confusion) as the cameras caught Savard mouthing the words to the AMERICAN National Anthem like it was a gold medal game in the Olympics. Hey Marc, you are a Franco-Ontarian (you spell your damn name with a "C")...what in the hell are you doing tearing up at another country's anthem? If that wasn't enough, Savard was at his weasel best, slashing Tucker in the back of the leg after Chara was flattened - Mar-C, consider yourself lucky that you only got a shot in the chops for that one, I'd keep my head up tomorrow night if I were you. Note to Bruins' fans; Savard is a chump in every sense of the word, and you'll find out soon enough - he owes last year's success (and 50% of his new contract) to Ilya Kovalchuk and Marian Hossa.

Columbus Blue Jackets' new head coach Ken Hitchcock made headlines last week - primarily for being a jackass. Hitchcock first official statement upon being hired to coach Columbus on Wednesday was that "out of respect for the Flyers' organization" he wanted to sit out Friday afternoon's matchup between the Jackets and Flyers. For the record, Columbus lost.

Buffalo Sabres' fans - please stop chanting U-S-A when your team plays a Canadian team. If you check your roster, you would see that you have a grand total of TWO US born players. So I guess my question is who in the hell are you chanting to you bunch of morons.


NFL
Atlanta Falcons QB Ron Mexico had a day to remember yesterday against the New Orleans Saints. Vick was a scintillating 9 for 24 for 84 yards in a loss to the Saints; Vick blamed his receivers for not catching balls (I guess he must have missed Alge Crumpler flipping out when Vick fail to spot him open for the 20th time on the day). To make matters worse, Vick responded to the boos of the twenty-four (or so) fans left in the stands by flipping them the double bird; with the customary after the fact half-assed apology. No, Michael Vick isn't a coach killer - not at all. Atlanta, find a taker for this guy and start over - the Lions or the Raiders might be stupid enough to give up the number one pick in this year's draft for Vick - DO IT.

New York Giants head coach Tom Coughlan lost his mind during a post-game conference after making history yesterday in a game with the Titans. Coughlan, who has criticized his team for airing their dirty laundry to the press called out his whole team by saying they were awful, and basically pinning the loss on Manning for the late interception. The Larry Brown of the NFL is about to find himself on the unemployment line - deservedly so if you ask me.

I was disappointed to hear that Michael Irvin offered his thoughts on why Dallas QB Tony Romo has been so successful. I'll start by saying that Irvin was one of my favourite Cowboys' - but his supposed "tongue in cheek" comment about Romo's bloodlines was beyond stupid. Irvin has managed to flaunt the fact that he can get away with saying stuff that would get most people canned in a heartbeat - how about those double standards huh? Michael, please...for Cowboys' fans all over - just stick to screaming "Jacked-Up" as you and the ESPN gang try to manufacture enthusiasm for your pre-game show. Please.

Speaking of former Cowboys - Dallas announced today that they had released Canadian-born K Mike Vanderjagt. Given what he has done this season - I don't think there is anything else to say about "the liquored up kicker".

The Detroit Lions, their fans and organization, for their pathetic display on Thanksgiving Day. The PA Announcer introduced Miami's defence - fine; but after introducing them, he introduced Joey Harrington as the QB, when Harrington wasn't in the tunnel. The introduction brought a chorus of boos from the Lions' faithful. Look, I'm not "Happy Feet" Harrington's biggest fan by any stretch, but for an organization to do that and their fans to boo a guy who busted his ass and gave 110% week in and week out for an awful football team...that is beyond weak. Hey Lions' fans (of which I'm pretty sure none of you are) how do you like Kitna? He made your team a whole lot better didn't he?

I would say something about the performances put in by Rex Grossman, Ben Roethlisberger and the Jakes, Plummer and Delhomme - but what you saw last week weren't necessarily awful performances...I think its more of a case of these guys just regressing to what they are - average to slightly below average NFL QBs.

That's about it for tonight...I know I'm forgetting a few notables on both sides. Have a great one peeps!

Hazel, I hope things are groovy in your world and that you had a great long weekend.

Song of the Night on Hazelspeeps - just cuz

Good People - Jack Johnson

Peesth Out...Buh Bye!

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