Weird and Whacked Wednesday - NCAA Style

Hey Peeps and anyone else checking in - from those of you who have been here before and check back once in a while, to those of you that may have happened on this page for the first time. A special "Hey" goes out to Ms. Hazel Mae.

For those of you who haven't been here before, Wednesday entries recap the weird, the whacked and the downright silly news and events from the world of sports over the past seven days or so. New Year's south of the Canadian border means College Football Bowl games - so what better place to start this week's Wednesday edition of the Weird and Whacked.

NCAA
WAS THAT A GUN IN HIS PANTS? OR WAS HE JUST HAPPY TO SEE THEM?
Former Ohio State Running Back Maurice Clarett is making news again - this time he is in a world of trouble. Clarett was arrested and charged with brandishing a gun to rob two people at a Columbus Ohio Bar on Sunday morning; Clarett was subsequently released after posting a $50,000 bond. If convicted, he faces up to 20 years in prison - for a cell phone.

The really whacked part of this story? First - this botched robbery netted him a cell phone; second, according to CBS Sportsline, Clarett felt so connected to Ohio State and former teammates that he waited until AFTER they beat Notre Dame to turn himself in. How Clarett has fallen this far, this quickly is beyond me...if it wasn't so sad, it might be kinda funny.

HITTING THE FLAGSTICK?
UCLA Bruins kicker Justin Medlock is charged with one felony count of driving under the influence of alcohol causing injury - after he crashed his 1998 Toyota pickup truck into a call box, and seriously injury a member of UCLA's Women's golf team - Hannah Jun. The whacked part of it is Medlock's lawyer is not arguing that his client was not drunk or anything like that - he's just saying it isn't a felony. I don't know much about U.S. Law - but I think that felony means time in a federal penitentiary.

Note: As I type this, I am listening to USC's Marching Band do their rendition of Michael Jackson's Beat It. Scary to say the least

VICK TO AUDITION FOR STOMP!
The referree at this year's Gator Bowl claims that the behaviour of Marcus Vick (the next Lord of the Dance) and his Virginia Tech Hokie teammates was "brutal". Steve Usecheck says he and his crew didn't see Vick's stomp (he should have been in Riverdance) - but had he seen it, he would have thrown Vick's ass out of the game.

The Weird thing - an official admits they all missed it...you never hear that.

The Whacked thing is that he says that V Tech's taunting and late hits were the worst he has seen in 22 years...yet only one player was ejected. Wouldn't that ejection have cause the crew to keep a closer eye on things?

NFL
THE WHIZZINATOR MUST BE LAUGHING
Daunte Culpepper, Fred Smoot, and Bryant McKinnie of the Minnesota Vikings have all pleaded Not Guilty to charges related to the Vikes version of "Tub Rub". They, along with teammate Moe Williams, have been charged with indecent conduct, disorderly conduct and lewd and lacivious conduct (can you picture Don King as the judge with that last charge?). Suddenly, Onterrio "The Whizzinator" Smith must be smiling...I wonder if the Whizzinator could help them with a polygraph test.

Do I really have to go into the weird, whacked and downright silly in this story? Come on now...really?

SPEAK NO EVIL?
Chad Johnson of the Cincinnati Bengals is not going to say anything this week - Chad has nothing to say. Johnson says a "higher authority" has told him to keep his mouth shut. Again, I say Chad Johnson is staying quiet this week - the NFL won't be the same without sound and video clips of Chad - that qualifies for a Wednesday entry.

I bet Chad would talk to Hazel if she asked him - watch, if the Pats end up meeting the Bengals - he'll talk to her...if she asks. Who is going to say no to speaking with Hazel?


BOXING
LIGHTENING QUICK HANDS
Former boxing champion Thomas "Hitman" Hearns faces misdemeanour assault and battery charges for allegedly striking his 13 year old son. Word from Police is that the incident happened when Hearns' son wouldn't leave his brother's bedroom when asked...or "didn't move fast enough". I think that qualifies as Whacked.

Former boxing champion, and International Boxing Hall of Fame member, Jeff Fenech was charged with three watches (worth $290) from a jewelry store in Australia. The weird thing is the three time champion trained Mike Tyson for his last fight on June 11. Training Mike Tyson...is that weird? whacked? or downright silly? Maybe all three?

NHL
DEVIL MADE HIM DO IT
Lou Lamoriello announced that the New Jersey Devils have released winger Alexander Mogilny. The man once called "The Night Train" (if you don't know the story, I'll post it) now affectionately referred to as "ALMO" by members of Leaf Nation - left Toronto this off-season to sign with the Devils. I think Mogilny gets signed by Toronto later this year for a run in the playoffs. Mogilny is a character...New Jersey just got a little worse.

The weird thing is that Lamoriello made a mistake - time will tell if it will be the fact that he signed ALMO or released him...but Lamoriello making a mistake is as rare as Mike Milbury making a good decision. No, I'm NOT taking a shot at Mike O'Connoll...we'll leave it at Milbury OUCH.

That's about it for this week's wrap up...hope it was worth a chuckle or two. Thanks for stopping by and be sure to check back in.

Have a great one peeps...shout out to the newest member of the peeps - my man "Schuey" from Calgary (I assume from his email addy) who misses seeing Hazel on Sportsnet...I feel your pain brother...I feel your pain. New NFL polls on Yahoo site...and DJames wades into the debate with a viewpoint that only HE would have...worth the read - he's a character.

Hazel, I hope things are groovy in your world...you or the gang at NESN should have a peek at the Yahoo site - changes taking place.

Song of the Night on Hazelspeeps - For Chad Johnson and his vow of silence, to Maurice Clarett who stills blames Ohio State for his problems, to Thomas Hearns who wanted his son OUT of his brother's bedroom...to Fred Smoot who was livid after being charged in "Tub Rub"

Shout - Tears for Fears

Shout, Shout
Let it all out
These are the things
I can do without


Peesth Out!