Monday, November 06, 2006

The Hazies - The Champs & Chumps

Hey Peeps and anyone else checking in. A special "Hey" goes out to Hazel Mae.

For those of you who haven't been here before, Monday night entries take a look back at the week or so that was in the world of sports, highlighting some of the more notable performances. To those who have risen above the rest, we award them with an honourary "Hazie" - the lucky few have the title of "Hazel's Hero" bestowed upon them. While Hazel hasn't officially approved this week's winners, we'd like to think she would give her trademark smile and thumbs up.


Pittsburgh Penguins' super rookie Evgeni Malkin makes the cut for the second straight week. Malkin's scored two goals against the Los Angeles Kings last Wednesday in a 4-3 overtime win - what made it significant was that Malkin became the first player in 89 years to score a goal in each of his first six games in the NHL.

Florida Panthers goalie (and resident tough guy) Ed Belfour stopped 23 shots last Thursday in a 4-2 victory over the Toronto Maple Leafs (it pains me to post this one). The win was career victory number 460 for Belfour, tying him for second place on the all-time list with Jacques Plante. He'll never catch former Habs/Avalanche goalie Patrick Roy for number one all-time, but we heard Eddie had a couple of beers to celebrate - Alex Auld didn't make it to the celebration.


I know most New Englanders are still seething over last night's game against the Colts, and the Patriots decision to stop running the ball. But you know what they saw about the darkest clouds having silver linings. WR Troy Brown caught five passes last night to pass Stanley Morgan as the Patriots all-time leading receiver with 538 receptions. About the darkest cloud - Marvin Harrison's two TDs gave him 115 for his career - putting him atop the Colts all-time list (while she probably hated the game last night - I think Hazel would acknowledge Harrison's accomplishment, albeit grudgingly).



Larry Johnson of the Kansas City Chiefs ran for 172 yards on 27 carries, with a TD, in a win over the St. Louis Rams. It sucked for my pool, but since I left Larry off Hazel's Three Stars this morning, I had to find a way to highlight his day.

Drew Brees of the New Orleans Saints had another great game in a 31-14 win over Chuckie's Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Brees completed 24 of 32 passes for 314 yards and 3 TDs; word out of Tampa was that Brees didn't say "Hi Mom" when the cameras caught him on the sideline - go figure.

Javon Walker of the Denver Broncos did the unthinkable yesterday - he made Jake Plummer look like a decent NFL QB. Walker caught 6 passes for 134 yards and added two TDs in a 31-20 victory over the Steelers - and you know how much we hate the Steelers here.

Daniel Briere of the Buffalo Sabres had two goals, including the overtime winner, and an assist to leading his team to a 4-3 victory over the Rangers.


Ben Roethlisberger heads up the list of this week's chumps. Big Ben had another awful game yesterday against the Broncos; throwing three INTs and a fumble for good measure. Now will Steelers' fans please shut their pie-holes about another Steelers run? They're done!

Rex Grossman of the Bears had a day that he and Bears' fans would like to forget. Grossman also threw 3 INTs, and did Big Ben one better by throwing a pick for a TD to Miami DL Jason Taylor. Bears' fans across North America are starting to worry about Grossman - they won't admit it...but they are.

Memo to Brett Favre - its time to go. Favre threw two INTs yesterday, including one that was taken back for TD by London Fletcher. Favre isn't helping Green Bay win, he is just delaying Aaron Rodgers' progress. Check out the photo of Favre on the link.

Detroit Lions' WR Roy Williams is a jackass. I watched some of the game yesterday and watched this idiot celebrating 1st down receptions like they were game winning TDs in the Super Bowl. Roy, your team is now 2-6 - you guys are terrible, just concentrate on playing football.

Mike Vanderjagt - enough said.

The Ottawa SenaTards blew a 2 goal lead to the Carolina Hurricanes on Saturday night - that is not the reason they are chumps. "Why then?" you ask. Well, rather than answer questions after the game - the Tards held a "Closed-door, Players-only" meeting to talk amongst themselves. The talk must have been a great one because these clowns blew a THREE goal lead to the Capitals tonight and lost in overtime.

Arsene Wenger, manager of the Arsenal Gunners, lived up to the 1st part of his name. Wenger took exception to the celebration of West Ham's manager Alan Pardew, after the Hammers scored a late goal to beat Arsenal. Wenger got into a shoving match and refused to shake his counterpart's hand after the game. Oh, in case you were wondering - YES, Wenger is French...though I think most of England has anglicized his name to WANKER.

That's about it for tonight gang - have a great one peeps!

Hazel, I hope things are groovy in your world.

Song of the Night on Hazelspeeps - in celebration of another SenaTards loss

Three Cheers For Ottawa - Fan 590

Three cheers for Ottawa,
They think they got a shottawa
They must be smoking pottawa
Cuz the Stanley Cup will never go to Ottawa

(sung to the melody of the Chanuka song by Adam Sandler)

Peesth Out...Buh Bye!


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