People We Want To Punch

Hey Peeps and anyone else checking in. A special "Hey" goes out to Hazel Mae if she is checking in.

We'll start by saying that we are, in no uncertain terms, feeling a little crusty today. Imagine the surprise of opening up our email (thoughtsofhazel@gmail.com) and seeing five emails - we thought we had a mailbag, there hasn't been that many emails in a day since Renee, our resident provocateur/temptress posted here.

Instead it was just a few of your smartasses emailing to tell us what we were already painfully aware of - Portugal tied freaking Armenia yesterday in the qualifying stage of Euro 2008. We were all set to rip the cartel known as FIFA a new one for dropping Portugal down to number 10 in the world rankings and the boys go out and tie freaking Armenia? What a disaster - we'll have to run the table now. To those of you who emailed to rub it in - we'll be back, and we hope to hear from all of you when we make it all the way back!

But on the bright side, at least some of you are following it.

Continuing on with our sunny disposition today:

Why can't Curt Schilling just keep his mouth shut?
With Red Sox Nation just having gotten over a minor scare with the Yankees closing the gap to four games, you would think that, when approached by the media, Schilling would be talking about the here and now - about what the Sox have to do the rest of the way and in the playoffs; but that would just be stupid to think that, wouldn't it? Schilling, as is his way, was more than willing to talk about what he has planned for next year and where he might be pitching - he even has a freaking list of teams he would pitch for and plans to contact them to "explain his situation". As is the way with "Shill" he started out by saying that he was focused on this year, but is "absolutely" thinking about next year. Sounds like a guy who is focused huh?

Why wouldn't he just be a team guy and say "I'm not thinking about next year - I am thinking about bringing the World Series trophy back to the good people of Boston"? You would think that, pitching the way he has been this year, he would be so focused on getting his game straight that he wouldn't have to write teams to express interest. This guy is a piece of work.


Don't worry Vick - Stephon Marbury has got your back
Why would someone from the Associated Press think that anyone would care about Stephon Marbury's opinion on the Michael Vick situation? So Marbury equates dogfighting to hunting - ok, that's dumb. If that wasn't enough, Stephon thinks that dogfighting is a sport, "its just behind closed doors" - ok, that's just stupid. Maybe Stephon will pitch "Wednesday night (dog) fights to ESPN2.

Think Michael Vick sent Marbury a text message that read "Shut the F* up Stephon"? More bad news for Vick - the CFL won't have him up here while he is suspended from the NFL . So much for our idea about him being up here.


Who does Tiki Barber think he is?
We hate everything about the New York Giants (and the Eagles, and the Redskins...and you can throw in the 49ers too) so we found it somewhat amusing to hear Tiki Barber call out Eli Manning last Sunday night. Barber, in his new role as studio analyst for the NFL called out Manning for his lack of leadership qualities and had a chuckle about Peyton's little brother trying to speak to his teammates. Eli has responded and backtracked on his bitch slapping of Barber. While we love to see trouble in New York, we can't help but wonder what makes Tiki Barber think he is in a position to call out his former teammate?

Obviously the glare of the lights and the pressure of national audience (what? 5,000 people for a Sunday night pre-season game) got to Tiki - cause he was talking like a guy that had forgotten that for the first eight years of his career he was choker that fumbled more often that Rex Grossman on a rainy night and led his team to absolutely nothing. Barber has obviously blocked out the fact that until Tom Coughlan taught him how to hold on to a ball - he couldn't be trusted to be his team's number one back. Two good years and he thinks he has the right to call out a player who will probably be better than he ever was? Tiki, shut up...please.


Does anyone else want to punch Ron Jaworski?
It is going to be a long, long, long season for football fans tuning in to watch Monday Night Football. Five minutes of Jaworski was enough to make us want to crawl through the screen and punch him right between the eyes. While everyone hated Joe Theismann - we think that by game eight - people will wishing Theismann was back after listening to Jaworski and Kornheiser; they're awful. Jaworski thinks that everyone is an idiot and that HE has to explain every nuance of the game "a good running game is the quarterback's best friend" thanks Ron. Jaworski lost and and all credibility when he kept referring to a comparison between Grossman and Peyton Manning at the 23 game point in their respective careers - that's just assinine. Contrary to what you may think - viewers aren't half as dumb as you may think and they don't care about your comparisons; check that, maybe Dick Vermeil does. Don't even get us started on Kornheiser - PTI doesn't work on Monday Night, jackass.

CBS Sportsline's Mike Freeman wrote an article about one of the best NFL announcers of all time - Pat Summerall. Summerall said that in broadcasting games, more is less, speak less. Jaworski and Kornheiser would do well to read that article.


Bettis should be on the "short-bus"
Someone told Jerome Bettis that it would be a good idea to write a book about his career in the NFL - ummm ok? Bettis' book includes a story about how he "faked" an injury in 2000 so that the Steelers couldn't cut him in pre-season. Not sure what Bettis was thinking when he included that story in his book - it strikes us as more embarassing than anything else. Tiki Barber and the Bus - who thought these two would be good additions to NFL coverage?


Thank you Columbus
The Columbus Blue Jackets are set to sign free agent C Michael Peca. As members of Leaf Nation, it isn't that we are happy to see Peca go - but we weren't down with the speculation that JFJ would trade a young player like Matt Stajan to make room for Peca.

On last thing - can fans of the Toronto Blue Jays please shut up now? Getting swept by Oakland should be enough to stop all this nonsense about the possibility of a Wild Card - you're GONE. The line for J.P. Ricciardi's special kool-aid starts at Gate 3.


TUESDAY'S THREE STARS
Los Angeles Angels LF Garrett Anderson had four hits, including a grand slam and a three run home run, and drove in ten to lead the Angels to a 18-9 win over the Yankees; meaning we get to ignore ARod's two home run performance.

Boston Red Sox P Jonathan Papelbon recorded his 30th save in a 8-6 win over the DRays - "Paps" became the first Red Sox reliever to save 30+ games in consecutive seasons.

Baltimore Orioles P Eric Bedard improved his record to 13-4 with a strong seven inning performance in a 6-2 win over Texas - Bedard gave up two earned runs on five hits while striking out eleven. He is making a case for Cy Young consideration.


WEDNESDAY'S THREE STARS
Milwaukee Brewers 1B Prince Fielder hit a 1st inning single to break Brandon Webb's scoreless inning streak - the outcome of the game is not important. The important thing is that Orel Hershiser's record is in tact - eat that Dibble! You'll have to listen to Orel talk about "climbing the mountain for a few more years" you big jerk.

Red Sox West RF Andre Eithier ha dtwo hits, including a home run, and three runs batted in to led Big Blue to a 15-3 win over the Phillies. The only bad thing was that we learned Phillies lefty Cole Hamels will be lost to the Maeple Leafs for up to two weeks with an elbow strain.

The Texas Rangers scored 30 freaking runs yesterday - that's right 3-0 runs on 29 hits and 8 walks in a 30-3 win over the Orioles. Who wasn't a star yesterday? Catcher Jarrod Saltalamacchia had two home runs and seven runs batted in..if you want to pick someone.


THURSDAY THREE PLAY
Another missed opportunity yesterday - it would have been a good day had we gotten on to post...blame Tilt for not being available at work yesterday. The total for the week stands at + $55 after a 2-1 night on Monday. Today's suggestions:

Minnesota over Baltimore - the Orioles burned everyone in their doubleheader yesterday, so expect Boof Bonser and the Twins to get a win at Camden Yards. Lay $100 on the Twins - $110.

Boston over Chicago - you have to like Josh Beckett who has been very good on the road all year; the White Sox send John Danks to the mound...this could get ugly FAST. Lay $100 on the Red Sox - $190.

Los Angeles over Toronto - its "Rojo" against Ervin Santana who is coming off a good start. Blue Jays fans will be hoping that their boys pull it together on the road...unfortunately for the good people of Toronto, the Jays are horrible on the road and the Angels are good at home. We're ignoring our own suggestion to avoid Anaheim-based teams. Lay $100 on the Angels - $150.

That's it for today gang - thanks for taking the time to check in. Have a great one peeps.

Hazel, we hope things are groovy in your world.

We're Out.