Monday, October 30, 2006

The Hazies - Champs and Chumps

Hey Peeps and anyone else checking in. A special "Hey" goes out to Hazel Mae.

For those of you who haven't been here before, Monday night entries take a look back at the week or so that was in the world of sports, highlighting some of the more notable performances. To those who have risen above the rest, we award them with an honourary "Hazie" - the lucky few have the title of "Hazel's Hero" bestowed upon them. While Hazel hasn't officially approved this week's winners, we'd like to think she would give her trademark smile and thumbs up.


Tomas Kaberle of the Toronto Maple Leafs had a game to remember on Saturday night against the Montreal Canadiens. Kaberle was in on all four goals the Leafs scored in regulation, recording his first career hat-trick and adding an assist. Kaberle started out the shootout with his fourth goal of the night (though it doesn't count on his stats). I'm thinking Hazel would be cool with this one - being that it is for a Maple Leafs player (and a Maeple Leafs player in the yahoo pool).

Evgeni Malkin of the Pittsburgh Penguins is off to a flying start, after missing the first few games of the season with a shoulder injury. While Crosby gets the majority of the press in Pittsburgh (rightly so, for the start he is off to), Malkin has started his NHL career with 5 goals and 4 assists in his first five games. This guy is going to be scary good - and I think he is going to be a better player than Crosby.

Brian Kilrea, coach of the Ottawa 67's, won his 1,100th career game in the Ontario Hockey League. For our American friends, we know that after professional sports, we know that college sports are huge south of the border; up here though, junior hockey is bigger than some professional sports - so this milestone is a huge. Kilrea has spent his entire career with the 67's, except for a brief leave of absence to coach the New York Islanders of the NHL. Kilrea is a giant in the hockey world. I have to think Hazel would be down with handing out the hardware to a hockey legend up here.

The Atlanta Thrashers walked in to Buffalo last Friday and beat the Sabres in shootout, ending Buffalo's 10 game winning streak. If you are a hockey fan, you have/had undoubtedly heard that the Sabres were looking to surpass the Toronto Maple Leafs for the most wins to start a season. So the Sabres tied Pat Burns' Maple Leafs team, but an asterisk should be placed beside the Sabres' achievement - when the Leafs did it, there were no shootouts to decide a game - a tie was a tie. But, we are here to honour "The Champs" from the past week - so kudos to the Thrashers...Leaf Nation salutes you.

LaDanian Tomlinson rushed for 188 yards on twenty five carriers and three touchdowns against the St. Louis Rams on Sunday afternoon. While he didn't get one of Hazel's three stars this morning (what? How could I not give it to Larry Johnson of the Chiefs? I think Hazel would rather have given a star to Johnson than Tomlinson) - he gets a Hazie for tying former Cowboys RB Emmitt Smith for the second quickest RB to reach 90 TDs; Tomlinson and Smith did it in 86 games - former Browns RB Jim Brown did it in 81; pretty select company to be in.

The St. Louis Cardinals shocked the baseball world in disposing of the heavily favoured Detroit Tigers in 5 games last week. The Cardinals who limped home in September found their groove in October and showed the heart of champions in sweeping the Tigers at home in games 3, 4, and 5. What made this all the more impressive was that they did it with guys that were banged up - Pujols and Rolen led the walking wounded. They'll meet Dubya - but if you asked them, I bet most would rather meet Hazel.

It has been a while since we have taken a look at some of the more "notable" performances from the last week or so; we used to refer to these special sporting icons as Hazel's Zeros. Well, I'm resurrecting the list this week (much to my man Adam's chagrin) because it was a weekend that saw some awful performances and some decision making that would leave even the dumbest sports fan scratching their head.



Ben Roethlisberger
of the Pittsburgh Steelers heads up this week's list of chumps. Big Ben came back from what was said to be a concussion to throw four interceptions - two going for TDs, including one that was returned 100 yards - and lead (?) the Steelers to their fifth loss in seven games. The ultimate manager is proving to be an average to below average QB this year - and this Dallas Cowboy fan is loving it.

Donovan McNabb, that Chunky soup lovin' mama's boy, put in another forgettable performance against Jacksonville yesterday. He didn't throw any picks this week - which must have pleased Andy Reid, who must almost suffered whiplash watching Tampa run McNabb's INTs for TDs - but he didn't get it done...again. This guy was being trumpetted as the leading candidate for MVP after 4 games - I keep telling you that McNabb and the Eagles are counterfeit.

Marvin Lewis of the Bengals should be fired; he won't be fired, but he should be. Lewis has completely lost it - witnessed by the fact that this genius called a timeout and brought his team to the sidelines before the Falcons were about to kick off after scoring. The timeout Lewis burned in the third quarter BEFORE a kick off is inexcusable and ended up biting the Bengals in the ass late in the fourth quarter when Atlanta was running down the clock. The Falcons were able to run the clock down to 19 seconds before punting to the Bengals.

Dennis Green of the Cardinals - no explanation needed.

Bob Clarke - just for being Bob Clarke; if you still have questions, read the entry about Clarke resigning and you'll understand.

There you have it...this week's Hazies, and all the rest. If you have any suggestions - leave 'em in the comments box. Have a great one peeps!

Hazel, I hope things are groovy in your world.

Song of the Night on Hazelspeeps - I'm in one of those "just because" moods

Bridge to Nowhere - Sam Roberts

Peesth Out...Buh Bye!


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